It’s the one PPV of the year in which every match has a gimmick. That’s every TNA PPV you say? Oh well.

Both top matches are repeated from last month and simply have different stipulations, but with Jeff Hardy and Edge in a ladder match, I’m not sure you can go wrong.

The opener is the US title match.

1. Kofi Kingston vs. William Regal vs. Matt Hardy vs. MVP

Michael Cole said that MVP has a rematch clause in his contract. And if that was the case, why would he use it in a four way where he has a worse chance to win then if it was one on one?

The match was a bit sloppy, but still decent. MVP screwed up in the corner as Regal had Kingston on the top rope, ready for a superplex. MVP was supposed to suplex both of them, but slipped on the ropes.

Regal was awesome with all of his offense and he took the fall after Kingston hit him with the enziguri. Fun match.

Winner: Kofi Kingston

2. Chris Jericho vs. Rey Mysterio

It’s a no holds barred match.

This built up tremendously. They really didn’t use the no holds barred stipulations until the end. The guys just work so well together. Specifically, the last five minutes were tremendous.

Jericho had Mysterio in the Walls and Mysterio grabbed a chair and blasted him in the face. He had Jericho against the ropes for the 619 and when Mysterio ran the ropes, Jericho pulled his mask off. (The reason Mysterio’s mask was so easy to pull off was because Jericho nearly took it off once already. And I’m guessing this was a camera screw up, but we did see Mysterio’s entire face at one point.) He then rolled Mysterio up for the win. Awesome finish to a really good match.

Winner: Chris Jericho

Jericho wins the IC strap.

3. Umaga vs. CM Punk

I tried explaining the strap match to the kids and they thought it was a boring type of match. I can’t say I blame them since I’ve seen strap matches before.

Whatever happened to having to drag your man to the corner? Both Punk and Umaga are just able to touch corners without even having the other guy near them. Maybe that’s a chain match.

For a strap match, it was decent. They both had many shots to win the match, but would upend the other when they had three corners touched. The dumbest one was when Umaga went over the top rope and Punk tried to touch all four, even though with Umaga out of the ring it meant he couldn’t reach the corner. Punk had three corners touched and Umaga came after him with the thumb of death, but Punk got him up in the GTS, hit it, and touched the fourth corner.

Winner: CM Punk

4. Tommy Dreamer vs. Jack Swagger vs. Christian

Why I missed parts of this match instead of Santina/Vickie, the world will never know.

But I did miss a lot of it. Dreamer did a somersault of the apron and onto the floor and onto Swagger and Christian with a garbage can in his hand. It looked comedic. The best spot of the match was Dreamer getting superplexed onto a garbage can.

Swagger and Christian had troubles late in the match near the finish. Swagger had a crutch and tried to hit Christian but missed. Swagger hit the snake eyes on Christian from his shoulders and then went for the doctor bomb. Dreamer hit Swagger with the crutch and then hit the DDT for the win. Dreamer is the new champ and doesn’t have to retire.

Winner: Tommy Dreamer

5. Santina vs. Vickie Guerrero

Vickie made it a handicapped match and added Chavo to the match who was unhappy with this.

It was exactly what you would expect. Chavo and Santina fought. Vickie thought Santina was done for and came in for the pin, but Santina got up, threw a bucket of slop (that was intended for Chavo) on Vickie, and then pinned her. Waste of time.

Winner: Santina

6. Batista vs. Randy Orton

This was weird. I guess it just caught me off guard. Batista defeated Randy Orton to win the title. The match was about Batista setting up the Batista Bomb and Orton was able to get out of it. Then, he just hit the move and the match was over. There was really no reason for this to be in a cage. It looks like the fans enjoyed it, but I’m kind of mystified as to why they’d take the belt off Orton right now.

Winner: Batista

7. John Cena vs. The Big Show

They’re trying to set this match up as the biggest of Cena’s career. Didn’t he win the last match at Judgment Day?

This match can be described as the tortoise vs. the tortoise. It was so slow. It was very much like a Hogan match from the 80s with a big heel. He took a beating and then came back to win.

He got him up in the FU, but Show punched him and he went out of the ring. After not being able to get him in the STFU, he hooked Show’s foot inside the bottom rope and put the move on for the tap out. Thankfully, that wasn’t the main event.

Winner: John Cena

8. Jeff Hardy vs. Edge

These guys are so over and have such good matches that they don’t have to kill themselves to have a great match here. But they killed themselves anyway.

Hardy dropped Edge on the ladder which was standing upside down and Edge took some hinges in the gut. Hardy went up a very high ladder and tipped it over towards the title (why he didn’t just set it underneath the title, I’m not sure) and hung on to the thing that holds the belt. He then had to fall down.

Hardy also hit a whisper in the wind from halfway up the very tall ladder.

They both went through a ladder and onto the floor. I don’t think the ladder broke their fall all that much.

Both up on ladders and Edge went for the spear and Hardy turned it into the twist of fate. These dudes are crazy.

Hardy pulled Edge through one of the rungs and Edge was stuck. Hardy then grabbed the belt. What a great match that was. Maybe the best I’ve seen this year. Yes, I know we had Taker and HBK at Mania. But I had a few issues with that match. They are probably one and two for me this year.

Winner: Jeff Hardy

What does this mean for Hardy who was supposed to take a bit of a vacation over the summer?

Just as I said that, here comes CM Punk ready to cash in his money in the bank.

9. CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy

Punk hit a GTS but Hardy kicked out. Then he hit another and it was all over. Punk is the new champion.

Winner: CM Punk

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